(I am feeling weird and uncomfortable about this unedited blogging thing. I mean, I am just typing stuff then PUTTING IT OUT THERE ON THE INTERNET! WHERE ANYONE CAN SEE! It’s shameless and can only lead to a bad end.)
Most of the houses on our street keep their lights off on Halloween night, which stinks, because there are a lot of young children in this neighborhood. I can’t blame them, though, after witnessing the ratio of uncostumed burly teenagers to legitimate trick-or-treaters this year.
In fact, at 9:30 p.m., Steve was getting Sebastian to bed and I had taken off my shoes and picked up Henry to feed him. I started the process — which involves a certain amount of immodesty on my part — heard a noise, looked up, and locked eyes through the window with a 17-year-old who was knocking on my door.
I hastily put myself together and pretend-cheerfully gave the three T-shirt-wearing kids candy because I feel like it is a kind of mob protection money. “This sure is a nice mailbox. It would be an awful shame if something were to… happen to it.” They didn’t actually say that. Well, they did. With their EYES.
Anyway, after going through Sebastian’s candy and removing everything with nuts (and er, shoving all the nut-candy in my maw), he still had a pretty good haul. So for the last two days I have gotten on the floor with him and helped him sort and count his candy. (Side note — don’t help a kid inventory his candy then eat half the Twixes while he’s at school. You will not get away with it.)
We’ve had so much fun, using our math skills to multiply packages of Whoppers by their contents (three per package — he has 21 Whoppers and he wrote that number down so don’t even think about it) and spelling out the words on the packages.
But despite the glee we’re feeling, I half-wonder if I’m doing something wrong by creating a warm and happy memory around junky-ass candy. I mean, I have serious food issues — show me someone in these corn-syrup-soaked times who doesn’t. Don’t the experts say to make sure to center your happy family times on something other than food?
I mean, tonight we had an impromptu picnic at the park, then on the way home we got some ice cream. Food and more food! But in between we ran around and played and laid on a blanket in the shade. Should we go hungry while we visit the park? Use freeze-dried astronaut meals to make sure we don’t enjoy it too much?
Anyway, Sebastian is a healthy little kid and we are having a good time counting candies and doling them out one or two at a time. I will try not to overthink it any more than I already have. I am much too busy worrying about burly teenagers unhappy with the quantity of candy corns I gave them.
Hey, how was your Halloween?